Six depressing reality checks from a single visit to LinkedIn
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Loading... - elijah sophia
- 27 Feb 2023
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The social media site of choice for arseholes, LinkedIn can induce unparalleled despair in just ten minutes. But what depressing truths lie in wait for you?
That twat from your first job is doing far better than you
Martin Bishop, the shit-useless admin assistant at your first job, now runs his own SEO firm which has won an award, while your career appears to have peaked at twenty-five. Deal with this by remembering the time Martin threw up in the cupboard at work after too much Hooch and got sent home.
You understand f**k all about your chosen field
You’ve been a business analyst for ten years but have no idea what this other business analyst is posting about. He’s written 20,000 words on being agile, whatever that is. Give it a thumbs up and write ‘Exactly!’ underneath in the comments section. Maybe employers will see it and headhunt you.
Everyone else does cool work travel
Why is everyone posting pictures of themselves at a conference in Vegas? Who lets them go to Vegas? The last trip you went on was to health and safety course at a Premier Inn on the Banbury ring road that didn’t even have good biscuits. Read More…
