How to ensure everyone knows you're ill
-
Loading... - Olympia Aetos
- 29 Jul 2022
- 92 Views
- 0 Like
- 0 Comment
You;ve come down with a serious, debilitating illness, although your coldhearted partner says it’s just a sniffle. Here’s how to make sure everyone knows how much you’re suffering.
Moan and groan
Display the agony of your mild illness by groaning your way through making a cup of tea, and gasp pathetically at your struggle to lift it. It’s almost guaranteed that other people will offer to take over. Not from sympathy, they just want you to shut the f**k up.
Avoid human contact
To imply your sniffle is highly contagious, avoid all contact with other humans as if you’ve got a deadly virus from Resident Evil. Refuse to accept any object unless it’s put on a safe surface and the carrier backs away. Ignore the obvious question – if you’re so ill why are you in work? Because you’re a trouper. A martyr. A bloody nuisance. Read More...
