Bad Relationships on Repeat? Break Your Unhealthy Patterns
These are just some of the relationship behaviors that some when reoccurring can leave you wondering, “How did I get here again?” The relationship may have even started great, you thought he/she was incredible, a nice person, a good match. But when red flags started to wave you either ignored them or excused them away because you wanted this to be what you hoped it was.
The chemistry is incredible! They are so doting and attentive! They are the life of the party!
If you’ve cycled through a lot of painful relationships and this sounds familiar, take heart in knowing you are one of many who with great intentions and hopes of love and finding your person who end up entangled in unhealthy relationships and yet, stick around. Hope is a powerful elixir and it’s often hard to see that the dream of what you thought they were is actually just that, a dream.
Healthy relationships require a number of pieces to fall into place from both people involved. A history of secure attachment and emotionally safety increase the chances that you have been provided the tools you need.
Here are more behaviors that often characterize unhealthy relationships:
· betrayal
· bullying
· verbal or physical abuse
· guilt
· isolation
· dishonesty
· control
· disrespect
· poor communication
· gaslighting
· drama
If you have often felt afraid, sad, lonely or angry in your relationships, it might serve you to explore why. Be open to reflection on your role in these unhealthy patterns as you surely have one. If you have stumbled into these relationships and have missed the red flags, become aware of these important indicators that you may be in a situation that is not ideal. Learn how to spot the red flags:
· Do you feel like you’re walking on eggshells?
· Is this person saying derogatory or unkind things to you?
· Are you losing yourself in the relationship?
· Do you feel confused or crazy sometimes?
· Are you regularly aware you aren’t getting your needs met?
Think of a person you know who is generally happy, confident, secure and tends to choose partners well. Imagine if this person were to meet someone and began seeing some of the red flags you’ve ignored in some of your relationships. What would they have done? They probably wouldn’t have stuck around once they determined that despite some of the shiny aspects to this potential mate, they deserved and wanted better in a relationship. Read More…